A very interesting, important, and well written post from Feministing.com about the issues surrounding the up coming revision of The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV-R).

dsm-grows

Raymond Blanchard has some proposals for expanding the “paraphilia” section including naming anything outside of “genital stimulation or preparatory fondling” as a disorder.  Also included is changing “Transvestic Fetishism” to “Transvestic Disorder” – specifically if you are a heterosexual, cisgender male.

Another frightening aspect of Blanchard’s proposal is that any sexual interest other than “genital stimulation or preparatory fondling” is now, by definition, a paraphilia. In his presentation, he claimed that paraphilias should include all “erotic interests that are not focused on copulatory or precopulatory behaviors, or the equivalent behaviors in same-sex adult partners.” Copulatory is defined as related to coitus or sexual intercourse (i.e., penetration sex). So, essentially, all forms of sexual arousal and expression that are not centered around penetration sex may now be considered paraphilias.

These suggetions only further gender and sexual stereotypes that hinder and shame the sexual experiences and gender identities of everyone.   Please read the post linked to above and become aware of this important current issue.

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I don’t usually go in for these sex advice articles from Yahoo! News but today I came across this piece that I actually agree with.

It talks about vibrators and encourages women to explore their sexuality with a nice vibrating friend.  I have met several women who were shocked that I owned and used vibrators and seemed nervous about the idea for themselves.  I think a lot of women (whether they watched Sex and City or not) have an image of Charlotte becoming “addicted” to her vibrator and that this is a bad thing, as it replaces men and takes over your life.  This article points out that addiction to orgasms isn’t a bad thing and even so, droves of women are not going to start locking themselves in their bedroom to spend time with their new pal.

Outside of the apprehension of women, I have also met men who are scared to know women who use vibrators.  I once walked into a sex toy shop with a man who looked at me horrified and said “Isn’t your partner enough for you?!” As if I’m some crazed nymphomaniac.  Some men can become threatened by sex toys thinking that they are somehow being replaced.  Instead, these men should embrace the use of toys as enhancing the sexual experience between themselves and their partner.

What I liked best about this article was that it lets women know that if they happen to be someone who does not like toys or doesn’t own several, than that is okay.  It doesn’t make you less adventurous or mean you have worse sexual experiences than those women who do use toys.

All in all, I was impressed by this article and encourage people to read it.  I also think I will steal the final questions at the end and pose them here:

How do you feel about vibrators? Do you own one? Do you use them as a couple?